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Super Noodles: Scissors not the Slurp

Super Noodles: Scissors not the Slurp

Do you, like me, occasionally eat the western super snack Bachelors Super Noodles (AKA Super Noodles) and find that juices fly off the noodles and into your eyes or onto other parts of ones person? Well now there is an answer, a technique known as the scissors not the slurp! Watch this instructional video...
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  • What colour is a mirror?
    January 14, 2010 | 13:55

    What colour is a mirror? Is it the colour of whatever it is reflecting? Is it clear/invisible? No. The correct answer is silver. Silver seems to be the new black at the moment. Starting the new decade in the most futuristic way possible, the youth in the south-east are covering themselves from top to toe in shiny, metalic, reflecting silver. As you can see in the image below, model Worcester Aprons is sporting an all in one silver jumpsuit, a mask in post Renaissance style and sneakers to match. In six months time we’ll all be dressing like Mr. Aprons.

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Smack the back of their legs!

2000 and niner: A climate of mistrust and cynicism prevail. Successive governments massage statistics to suit dick-dastardly plans; bankers are wankers, big-business sell souls for profit; idiot mothers feed their allergy-riddled babes hydrogenated fat, sugar and salt and swindle them of their innocence – creating mini-me chubster-consumers.

More of our neighbours than you could ever imagine are ready to lynch you for muttering a swear word; for smoking in public; for not recycling properly; for saying it as it is. The PC brigade inform our liberal, compassionate selves that we're the fascists!

It's like 1984. Or four-legs-good nonsense. Civil liberties are being eroded and our fellow men blink slowly and tell us: "if you don’t do anything wrong, then there’s nothing to worry about".

Well, SMACK THAT. We’re gonna swear because we can and it’s not fucking illegal